Steven Tyler Falls on His Face Not Off the Wagon

Dear, old and beloved Steven Tyler, had a great, big fall. Steven Tyler was at a hotel in Paraguay and was taking a shower when he began feeling really ill. Apparently he had food poisoning and felt so sick with nausea that he fell right on his face.

Steven Tyler front man of Aerosmith and a judge on American Idol was a little upset that people instantly started thinking that he had fallen off the wagon and was boozing and drugging again. However, he’s a big boy and admits that it’s something he’s going to have to deal with for the rest of his life.

Steven Tyler‘s past will always be a topic of subject if he falls, gets tongue tied, or anything outside the “normal.” Which normal for him now is looking like a chick and tons and tons of plastic surgery. That’s absolutely acceptable behavior and no one questions if he’s a horny or is smacking away some heroin as long as he looks like a total freak. Steven Tyler is just addicted to plastic surgery and it’s perfectly fine, because he’s 63 years old and in Hollywood you can’t be an old fart.

Steven Tyler busted his face pretty bad, but he took care of this rapidly, because after all, “the show must go on.” His manager called the American Embassy and found him the best hospital in the area where Steven Tyler was taken to and he took care of his busted up face in one shot. He literally killed 3 birds with one stone.

Steven Tyler stated: “They stitched up my eye. They did a little plastic surgery. And they fixed my tooth. All in one fell swoop.” How can he possibly leave a hospital without a little cosmetic surgery? It just wouldn’t be fun, you know?

Conclusion: Steven Tyler fell on his face not off the wagon. And his only vice is plastic surgery. All is well and Steven Tyler only postponed his show in Paraguay for one day and played yesterday with his band: Aerosmith and the tour shall continue.